Wanting Ella

icut was her kāishî. And she was determined to start afresh. Too long she had spent living in the confines of her parents home. Too afraid to go into the world after years of feeling guilt, shame, and pain.

She was done feeling that way. She was done with therapy, done with making such mistakes in her life. She was going to start afresh, she was going to start anew.

”I know what you
e thinking, mom. ” She was still observing the character. ”But Im ready. Staying indoors, locking myself away from civilization isn going to help me much longer. ” She placed a reassuring hand on her mothers shoulder and offered a light pat. ”Im strong and you know that. Now more than ever. Do you understand? ”

Her mother lowered her head and placed a hand on her chest while the other gripped the arm of the loveseat. ”Are you though? ” She turned to face her look alike and only child. ”You didn fall from a bike, didn break a leg, didn lose any limb, you lost you… ” She exhaled shakily and gripped the loveseat tighter the hand on her chest now a fist. ”Im just looking out for you. ”

Tears welled up in Ellas eyes a gut-wrenching feeling so intense she had to breathe in and out before speaking. ”I know. And youve done so marvelously, and I appreciate you for that. But its time to move on now. To start afresh. ”

After what seemed like another lifetime her mother turned around to face her. ”Will this make you happy? Moving? Can you handle it? ”

She nodded. ”If I couldn I wouldn have applied for the job. Its what Ive always wanted ma. You know that, right? ”

Her mothers emerald eyes glimmered with unshed tears yet she nodded her understanding. ”Since you saw When Harry Met Sally. You were obsessed with that movie and I have no idea why? ” A smile had formed on her mothers face, the sight bringing a smile to hers.

”Because its a great movie, as a writer you should know the power of true love, shouldn you? ”

Margaret smiled wistfully. ”Oh, but I do. I married mine. ”

Ella knew this was true. She had witnessed how much her parents loved each other. On more than one occasion.

”I need a chance, ma, to feel alive again. ” She held her hands in hers squeezing lightly. ”Just one. ”

Her mother watched their entwined hands before her gaze lifted to the vase and the dark purple flowers in them, her hand on her chest uncurling from a fist came towards Ellas neck to lightly touch the locket that rested there. She looked Ella in her eyes again and sighed, that look meant determination. And nothing could stop Ella when she was determined. She should know, she took after her after all. She sighed again and tucked a strand of her daughters unruly hair behind her ear. ”You
e sure you can handle this? ”

She watched Ellas eyes rest above the fireplace and saw a bright smile light up her face before nodding eyes still on the painting and secretive smile on her lips. ”Yes, ma. Im positive. ”

Margaret exhaled and glanced once more at the vase and the Iris flowers. ”When do you start packing? ”